I woke up this morning with a clear goal. I’m going to put my head down and work. I have to attack the source of my growing anxiety. The deadlines. The known and forgotten tasks and interdependencies weighing down on my soul until I can’t take a full, deep breath.

I wasn’t going to open medium.

I wasn’t going to do anything but work.

Email. I would fire through my email and destroy it. Tear it down to zero waiting.

And then I found my Medium Daily Digest.

And then I read this piece.

And then I cried a little.

And I sat for a bit. Wondering. Was it truly work that crushes me to the point of not breathing?

I’ve always taken on too much. As a distraction. A way to fend off the worry and the loneliness. But I hate people. Not my medium people. The real world, small talk and socially awkward people.

Which is bullshit. I know.

I yearn for community too. It hurts to admit it.

So please thank that sister inside. She spoke some wisdom I really fucking needed this morning.

And my life would really suck if I didn’t have you in it.